Reese: Father's Day

Although my husband thinks today was a holiday created by Hallmark to sell more cards and I somewhat agree, I do believe parents should each have their day of recognition. I say this partly because I will not give up Mother's Day and mostly because I truly believe being a parent is the hardest job on the planet.

Today is a happy day...I celebrate my Poppy - a man who is kind, full of life, hard working, protective of his family, and loves each of us more than we can imagine. His life is his family and his family is his life. I love you Poppy and treasure you deep in my heart.

Today is a sad day as I mourn the loss of my dad - it's an all encompassing sadness. I haven't spent hours crying but I've spent hours feeling sad, a little lost and clinging to my heavenly father for peace. I know my dad is in heaven and I wouldn't wish him back from his seat beside Jesus. But part of me longs to hear him say "hello beautiful girl, this is your father speaking". We didn't get any last moments with him. For that I'm both thankful and hurt. You never want a loved one to suffer but you never want them to go so quickly that you don't get the chance to say goodbye.

My dad and I have struggled with our relationship over the years. That is something I refuse to dwell on or regret. We were blessed with a friendship over the last year. A friendship that has brought me great comfort in the last week. For all of the imperfections my dad had many great qualities - he loved his kids & I've never known someone more proud of them, he was a giver, he served his country well, he had a beautiful singing voice, he would give Jackie Chan a run for his money!, he loved history, Geoffrey was his favorite (sorry Emily it's true!), he never turned a stray animal away, he drank Drambuie (what the heck is that anyway?), he loved Jesus, he played guitar, he rebuilt Corvettes, he loved my shoes, he could perform minor surgery on any hand, finger or toe when need be, he was loved.

I'm not angry at God for taking him so quickly. I'm thankful that he knew no pain. I selfishly wish that we would have been given a chance to say one more "I love you", give one last hug, spend one last moment. I'm sad that Mary and Emily no longer have him at home. I'm heartbroken that he will not be in the stands with us at Emily's graduation, nor will we see him walk her down the aisle. Although he won't be here on earth, I know he will be watching. I can see his face now as he watches Em walk across the stage and receive her diploma. I can also hear the sniffles as the doors open and reveal her all grown up in a white dress. He will be with us - in our hearts.

I pray that God will never quench my dad's spirit as it lives in our hearts. I pray that God will allow peace and joy in knowing my dad is sitting with Jesus singing "Glory to God, glory to God, glory to God forever - Steve Fee". As we sang the words in church this morning I just let it wash over me. It was surreal to think my dad was singing the same words as he gazed upon our heavenly father. Wow! I know I will be there one day too singing the same words worshiping the king. That is where I find peace.

And last but not least, I celebrate my husband today. He's a great dad. He loves his little girl. I'll try to explain just how much he loves her...for those of you who don't know Juddy, he needs sleep. He needs about 12 hours to function on all four cylinders. He rarely gets that. However, every morning when I get Reese out of bed and walk down the stairs, she heads straight to our room and over to his side of the bed shouting "daddyyyy". I scoop her up and put her on the bed where she crawls over, lays her head on him, wraps her arms around his neck and gently pats him. He opens his eyes, smiles really big and says "good morning Reese Piece". It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Whether he's been asleep for 4 hours or 12, the response is always the same. He walks in from a long day at work, drops his bag and immediately showers Reese with attention. He chases her around the "loop" in our house while she squeals with delight. He sings silly songs when she gets antsy in the car (and believe me he can't sing!). He takes pictures of her until she is blinded by the flash. He sneaks her bites of brownies. He let's her play in the shower just because she likes it. He checks on her at night to make sure she's okay. He loves her with all that he has and all that he is. Reese, you have a wonderful dad who treasures you. I hope that you will do the same all of your days.